Give Me Hope - Harusa
by purinsesu-sereniti
Summary: i'm really loving this ship right now! a lil harusa angst. set during s- anime canon.


"They're the only ones who can help us!"

Six pairs of eyes, four belonging to her guardians, the other two belonging to their mentor felines, stared back at her; seeing them across from her, their gazes uncertain, their gazes unsure and wavering, reminded her that they were on separate sides this time. For once, they could not come to an agreement. "We're all senshi, we can work together! We don't have to sacrifice anyone!" The very thought of sitting back to watch as the three Outer Senshi took the life of a potential fourth... No, she could not allow that. She _would_ not allow that. "Once they see... Once they see that I can do it, they'll realize they don't have to do it." Hearing her words as they tumbled from her lips, Usagi had to wonder if she sounded as desperate as she felt. She could, in a dark and awful way, understand what the Outers meant to do by killing Hotaru. She could understand the need and the want to destroy the enemy, to stop the spread of evil and darkness... But Hotaru was innocent. Hotaru, whether she was Sailor Saturn or not, was an innocent girl and a senshi! She was not an enemy. They could come to understand each other and Usagi knew there had to be a way to keep her from awakening and bringing about the destruction of the world. Besides... She'd brought about miracles before... This was hardly any different.

"Usagi, of course we're not going to let them hurt Hotaru-chan," Rei spoke up first, violet hues meeting blue, her gaze sympathetic but her face full of determination. "But they've made it clear that they don't want to work with us, that we can't see eye-to-eye." She watched as her princess' face crumpled and she closed her eyes. "You need to stop seeing them." Usagi's blue eyes snapped open and their gaze swiveled from face to face, as if she were hoping one of the other girls would speak up and defend her relationship with Haruka and Michiru.

"If they aren't on our side, then they're against us. They're enemies." Mako-chan said sharply, but her eyes softened as the blonde gasped, her eyes filling with tears. None of the four girls wished to hurt her, but if the Outers weren't going to help them, then they had to consider them enemies. Especially if they were willing to murder a young girl who very well wasn't who they thought her to be. "We're sorry, Usagi-chan, it's only for your safety..." She hated to see her cry, as they all did, but they had to be stern with her, they had to keep her from the others. Makoto reached out, as if she meant to touch the girl's hand, but she stepped back, shaking her golden head.

"They aren't our enemies," she murmured, before turning and rushing from the room. She heard them calling after her, even heard Rei's footsteps on the floorboards as she came after her, but as she flew down the shrine steps, she knew she'd not been followed. Turning a corner, Usagi walked down the street, her shoulders slumped, her head down; for a moment she thought about stopping off at Mamoru's apartment, but she knew he was with Chibiusa and in truth, she'd rather have been alone. Mamoru only would agree with the girls and Chibiusa didn't need to hear such a conversation. Walking the familiar path towards the park, Usagi sighed, wishing with all of her heart that she could make everyone understand. They were all soldiers, they should be comrades! They should all work together in order to protect the earth! There was no need to lose anyone, especially not an innocent young girl... No... There had to be another way to stop the spreading darkness. In her palm, she clutched the golden heart-shaped compact, feeling the warmth of the crystal within. With that... With that she could save the world. If any life would be lost, it would be her own, but that'd be better than losing someone innocent. Than losing all of the earth. If only the Outers could believe in her...

As she stepped around a mother with her children, Usagi looked around, the bench she usually occupied already by a tall, slim blonde, or as if she'd been waiting for Usagi all along, stood the moment their eyes met. "Odango," Haruka greeted with a wave as the younger girl approached, her face drawn, her usual demeanor dampened by what Haruka could only call sorrow. "Fighting with your boyfriend?" The look Usagi shot her was dark and aggitated, as if she was actually saying _you know what I'm upset about._ A sigh escaped and the older woman reached up a hand, running it through her cropped blonde locks. "Well, come on..." She gestured for the blonde to follow her and she began walking, following the path that led to a quiet, secluded spot in the park. "Michiru showed me this spot," Haruka said as she sat herself down in the grass, just on the edge of the pond. They were in the wooded area, a short distance from the path that most joggers took in the early mornings, a spot most people did not come to, far from the main area where most people hung out. It was a little dark, the canopy of trees above letting in only slivers of sunlight, cool and quiet; Usagi sat down beside Haruka, her legs stretched out, head tilted slightly back. "I know why you came." Haruka finally said, her tone of voice playful, which forced Usagi to turn to her. "You missed me."

Well, that wasn't _wrong_ , Usagi had to admit.

It had been well over a week since her last encounter with Haruka; they had met on the battlefield and they had fought, well... Her guardians had fought with them. Usagi had begged them to try and see reason, to join them and put their powers together. But Haruka and Michiru had declined. They would fight on their own, they would do whatever it cost to save the world. "That's not it." Usagi said, folding her arms over her chest, turning away with a little pout. "I didn't come _looking_ for you, anyways." She added in, closing her eyes, chin jutted out in a defiant sort of gesture. "I just needed to be alone." Ahh, Haruka realized, it had been a fight with her senshi then. A fight over her and Michiru, no less.

In all honesty, Haruka didn't necessarily wish to remain separate from the other girls- she wished they lived in a world and a time where they could work together. But their mission was to stop the darkness, to stop of messiah of silence from awakening... No matter the cost. Both she and Michiru had decided there was no need for those other girls to bloody their hands with the blood of a fellow soldier. Besides, those girls were ignorant, were too young and too innocent to know the truth: that there was no other way. Hotaru had to die because Sailor Saturn could not awaken. If she awoke, then there truly would be no hope. The five senshi were not strong enough to fight back against the darkness that Saturn would bring. No... This was how it had to be done. Haruka wished there was another way, but there wasn't, and so even if it forced the others to hate them, to fight against them... Even if they had to be enemies... It didn't matter because they would be safe from the anguish of taking a life. Beside her, Usagi opened her beautiful blue eyes and turned them upon her, lower lip quivering as she tried not to cry, as she tried to piece together her thoughts and feelings. "Don't look at me like that, Odango..." Haruka murmured, shaking her head, trying to give the girl a smile but she found she could not do it. In that moment, she could see the future, could see the same girl before her with a crown upon that magnificant head and a little pink-haired princess on her hip. The premonition passed and she wondered... Could everything the girl say be true? Could she really change the future? Could she truly save the world without taking Saturn's life? As she looked upon her, much as she had felt that time a month before, she truly believed it. But she couldn't change her way of thinking, not now, not ever. She and Michiru had a job to do and they would do it, no matter the cost.

Usagi opened her mouth to speak but a scream was heard through the trees; both girls jumped to their feet and without a moment of hesitation, they'd thrown their hands into the air, and when the light died away gone were their civilian forms. Breaking through the trees, the two soldiers came upon the battle scene: a monster with its hands on a civilian, the black star tattooed on its upper right arm giving off an eerie glow. The person was screaming as the light pulled for a shining crystal from their chest. Without another moment, both Sailor Moon and Sailor Uranus jumped into battle, Uranus breaking the contact between monster and human, while Moon knelt beside the civilian, her gloved hands expertly guiding the pure heart crystal back to their chest. "Sailor Moon!" Uranus prompted and the girl jumped up, her wand already in hand; this battle did not force her into using the Grail... This battle was over quickly. The moment that the monster was gone and the people began to peek out from their hiding places, the two soldiers were gone, leaving the civilians to help each other out from hiding and more than likely head home for the rest of the night, if not a day or two.

They stood before one another, still in their senshi forms, neither one wanting to leave the other. "In a different life, a different world... I'd love to fight beside you," Uranus finally said, causing the girl to look up, her eyes widening in surprise. Uranus smiled, shaking her head slightly, a chuckle escaping. "Don't give up hope, Odango..." A light flashed and gone was Haruka's fuku and she was returned to her street clothes. Backing up, Haruka knew it was time to go, time to meet up with Michiru. Raising her hand in a gesture of goodbye, Haruka turned away, her feet taking her only a few steps before they paused and she turned back. The girl had detransformed as well and stood, still and silent, watching as Haruka went. When she turned back around, Usagi's face broke into the widest of smiles, her eyes suddenly full of something that had not been there before: hope. Maybe someday, maybe if somehow, some way, things changed and Hotaru didn't have to be sacrificed and if they could beat the evil... Maybe then they could work together. And from the look upon Usagi's face, she truly believed that would be the case. Turning away once again, Haruka wandered past the trees and back onto the main path of the park. She found Michiru, waiting for at the entrance closet to their apartment building, and she smiled as the aquamarine haired female slipped her arm through hers.

For a little while after Haruka left her, Usagi remained in the spot she'd brought her to. The spot was calm and tranquil, reminding her of Michiru, who she remembered had been the one to show Haruka the spot. She knew, without a doubt, that Haruka wanted to be on her side. She knew from the way she had spoken and the words that she had said, that Haruka wanted to fight beside them, not against them. She didn't want things to be the way they were. She was so frightened of losing the battle, she was willing to do whatever it took to come out as the victors, even if that meant bloodying her hands. She and Michiru thought that this was their only option. That there was no other way to win. But, Usagi could not help but to smile, because she knew things would be different for them. There would be no reason for them to do anything like that. There was nothing they'd need to do but fight beside her and her other senshi. They would fight together. They would win together. Usagi vowed, right then and there, that she would never let the Outer Senshi suffer the despair of murder... She would proect them from that fate. She would save the world. She could not doubt herself, not anymore.


End file.
